I love Instagram. PICTURES. Pictures are the main reason I signed up for Facebook. I was a relative latecomer to Facebook, as compared to my peers, and what got me interested was that all the horse pictures I could ever want to see were compiled into one place. My friends’ horse pictures, professionals’ horse pictures, international events’ horse pictures. So Instagram hits the sweet spot for me- more pictures, fewer articles.
Instagram has also made it easier to quickly preview all the latest fashion. I WANT THAT! AND THAT! That goes on the A-list. This goes on the A minus list. This could go on the B-list. That’s an interesting take, oh, hmm, I don’t think I’d have made that choice. Why did she put that on her horse?
Below I have compiled my inner monologue on the current trends I don’t understand, dislike, or wish would go away. Each with a defense, of course:
- Excessively long ear bonnets: If I wanted to protect my horse’s entire face from flies, I’d buy a fly mask. If I wanted my horse to look like a mount from the Middle Ages, I’d buy him armor. Why do show jumpers look like they should be performing at Medieval Times?
- Three to four nosebands: Some of these are pre-fabbed, others are just piled on somehow. Last I checked, you could attach your standing martingale to the same noseband that you use to keep your horse’s mouth shut. Aesthetically, this causes me displeasure.
- Lacy show shirts: This is a great concept. I WANT THEM ALL. How does this work with a sports bra? I need to wear a sports bra. Please tell me how you can avoid seeing a sports bra through the lace.
- Tall boots with laces from toe to knee: These boots are beautiful; My concern is as follows. It took my husband 3 days to thread new laces into his deck shoes; I still can’t put new laces on regular field boots. What happens when the laces on these break? Is there a support team somewhere you can access?
- Tramp stamps on breeches: Can we all agree that tramp stamps went out of style in 2005? I guess it’s better to put them on clothes than on your body.
If you have answers to any of the above questions, comment below. In addition, we’d love to hear your horsey Instagram Inner Monologue!